It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
