you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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