I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
did i just pee glitter
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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