YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
