So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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