he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
