a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
