he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
