I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
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