reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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