so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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