thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Sext me about skeletons
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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