whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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