I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize