I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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