you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
