I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
