Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Randomize
