You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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