hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
