are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
She told me I should be a condom model.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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