physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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