Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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