1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
this is an emotional support booty call
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
