so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize