i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
