I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
