i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize