Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize