: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
