Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
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