i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
