Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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