yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize
