Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
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