my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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