how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Randomize
