I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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