I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
