Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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