Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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