I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
