he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
