My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize
