ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Shame - the story of my life.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
