office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
