We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
So apparently I’m into choking now
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
