He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
