I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Randomize
