Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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